Doris Lessing : “my husband couldn’t afford a wife who had [radical ideas].

Q: Were you surprised at the criticism you received after writing, in your first book, about leaving the kids from your first marriage behind you?

_71167309_71167308

image source : internet

Doris : Of course I wasn’t surprised. The thing was that this was a terrible thing to do, but I had to do it because I have no doubt whatsoever if I had not done it, I would have become an alcoholic or ended in the loony bin. I couldn’t stand that life. I just couldn’t bear it. It’s this business of giving all the time, day and night, trying to conform to something you hate. Nobody can do it without going crazy. My husband was a civil servant who became increasingly high in the ranks. He couldn’t afford a wife who had [radical ideas]. I wouldn’t have lasted. I became friends with the kids later, and the grandkids, and so on. I’m not pretending that anything terrible didn’t happen.

Source : http://www.salon.com/1997/11/11/lessing/

 

Advertisements

Bukowski: even men also suffer on the bed

In the August 4, 1972 issue of Nola Express, Alta, poet and publisher of the feminist press Shamless Hussy Press, admitted to being “shocked and hurt” by Bukowski’s rape fantasies-published by Fife in Nola Express.
charles-bukowski
[To Darlene Fife]
August 13, 1972
Your Alta is confused. There are men who rapes and men who think of rape. Writing of this does not mean the author condones the rape, even if it is written in the first person. The right of creation is the right to mention what does exit. I even know some women-personally-whose greatest desire is to be raped. Creation is creation. For instance, just because a man is black does not mean he can’t be a son of bitch and just because a woman is a woman does not mean she can’t be a bitch. Let’s not censor ourselves out of reality from a goody-goody stance. Also, from what Alta quotes from my column I can see that she is so fiercely righteous (almost akin to the religious maniac) that she misses the point of the whole thing-that I am poking fun at male attitude towards the female. I’m sorry that Alta has suffered on the marriage bed(as she mentioned). But let me remind the dear girl that men also suffer on marriage bad. Sometimes they are the ones who are doing service. Really. I might say that Alta is a female chauv. Pig. Men are also looking for women who are able to accept love. Prejudice works in all directions. But it’s almost useless to counter an attack like Alta’s. It will only goad her into more goody-goody wrong direction. But, still, sometimes these types must be answered. You know, they used to say, how can a person who loves pets, children and dogs be a bad person? Now it is, how can be a person who is against war, dirty water, dirty air, how can a person who is fighting for women’s right be a bad person? Or, it is used to be, he has long hair and a beard, he is all right. Well shit, you see, it can all be a stance…I reserve the right to create in any manner that reality or humor or even-whim-dictates. All right.